If you or someone you know is being forced into a marriage and is at risk: call the Police on 999. If your perpetrator is near you and it is not safe for you to speak, press 55 and the police will understand that you are at risk. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
If you need urgent advice, or need to get away call the 24 hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline: 0808 2000 247. For specialist advice, click here for a list of organisations, but most operate on weekdays, and usually between 9.00 a.m - 5.30 pm.
Forced marriage is a hidden crime. It is not restricted to any single racial, ethnic, or religious community or class. Men and women, girls and boys, and transgender people are forced into marriage
This site is updated regularly. Watch this space for the latest news on our work and the other challenges to forced marriage in the UK.
NCFM salutes the courage of the many brave women, men, and children who step forward to speak out against forced marriage in their communities. Often they face a lonely world, cut off from their families and communities.
We wish to remember those who died because they wished to flee a forced marriage; and all victims and survivors of forced marriage.
International Women's Day 2025
On International Women’s Day as we witness the global rise of patriarchy and misogyny, NCFM shares with all women and girls, the translations and transliterations of two Urdu poems.
Every year, all over the world millions of female foetuses are aborted, simply because their families and communities prefer males.
This poem by the Pakistani poet Zehra Nigah (1936-) captures the darkest depths of patriarchy and misogyny. It is the call of an aborted female foetus to her mother. Her refrain, ‘I got away, Ma’, records her existence as she tells her mother that she knows exactly why she thinks she has escaped. She records the men, fathers and brothers who abuse women and girls by deploying false claims of honour.
THERE IS NO HONOUR IN ABUSE. KEEP UP THE FIGHT AGAINST FEMALE FOETICIDE
Meiñ bach ga.ī maañ / I got away Ma
Meiñ bach ga.ī maañ
Meiñ bach ga.ī maañ
Tere kachche lahū kī mehñdī
Mere por por meñ rach ga.ī maañ
Meiñ bach ga.ī maañ
Gar mere naqsh ubhar aate
Voh phir bhī lahū se bhar jaate
Merī āñkheñ raushan ho jaatī
Tezab ka surma lag jata
SaTTe-vaTTe meñ baT jaatī
Be-kārī meñ kaam aa jaatī
Har ḳhvāb adhūrā rah jaatā
Merā qad jo thoḌā sā baḌhtā
Mere baap kā qad chhoTā paḌtā
Merī chunarī sar se Dhalak jaatī
Mere bhaa.ī kī pagḌī gir jaatī
Terī lorī sunñe se pahle
Apnī niiñd meñ so ga.ī maañ
Anjān nagar se aa.ī thī
Anjān nagar meñ kho ga.ī maañ
Meiñ bach ga.ī maañ
Meiñ bach ga.ī maañ
I got away Ma
I got away Ma
The henna of your raw blood
Coloured my being
I got away Ma
Had my features appeared
They’d be full of blood
Were they to see the light
Acid kohl would line my eyes
Exchanged in marriage
To settle dark scores
My dreams would be cut short
Had I grown a tiny bit
Pa’s stature would decrease
Were my veil to slip from my head
My brother would lose face
Before I heard your lullaby
I drifted into sleep
I came from an unknown world
And am lost in that world Ma
I got away Ma
I got away Ma!
This poem is by the progressive revolutionary Urdu poet FAIZ AHMED FAIZ (1911-1984). Faiz calls upon women to use their voice to resist injustice.
We share Faiz’s call in solidarity with the countless women who chant it in Urdu, and all those whom it has empowered in translation. Yehudis Fletcher, the founder of NAHAMU - a VAWG organisation for Charedi women, sent the poem to Nasreen Rehman because it gave her courage. Nasreen told Yehudis that she grew up in Pakistan empowered by Faiz’s poetry, which strengthened the resolve Pakistani women to resist the countless patriarchies that surround us.
RESIST PATRIARCHY AND MISOGYNY AND SPEAK OUT! KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT ON YOUR OWN.
BOL / SPEAK
Bol ke lab aazaad hein tere
Bol zubāñ ab tak terī hai
Terā sutvāñ jism hai terā
Bol keh jaañ ab tak terī hai
Dekh ki āhan-gar kī dukāñ meñ
Tund haiñ sho.ale surḳh hai aahan
Khulne lage qufloñ ke dahāne
Phailā har ik zanjīr kā dāman
Bol yeh thoḌā vaqt bahut hai
Jism o zabāñ kī maut se pehle
Bol ki sach zinda hai ab tak
Bol jo kuch kehna hai keh de
Speak for your lips are free
Speak, your tongue is still yours
Your moulded body is yours
Speak, for life is still yours
Look towards the smithy’s forge
The flames ablaze, the anvil red
Locks are being opened wide
And all chains loosen their hold
Speak, though limited, this time’s aplenty
Before you’re silenced and you die
Speak, for truth still lives on
Speak, say all that you must say.
Nasreen Rehman is Director of the National Commission on Forced Marriage (UK).
MAKE SURE YOU’RE SAFE.
If you are at immediate risk
CALL 999
You can also call The National Domestic Abuse Helpline
ANY HOUR OF THE DAY
ANY DAY OF THE WEEK
for free on: 0808 2000 247
Shafilea Ahmad and Banaz Mahmod were killed by their parents; the people who should have protected them the most
Shafilea Ahmed
In 2003, Shafilea was killed by her mother and father because she refused to live by their rules and marry a man of their choice
To read Shafilea's story and hear Pakistani film, TV, and theatre star, NADIA JAMIL as she recites Shafilea's poem, Happy Families, click here.
Banaz Mahmod
Banaz we remember you today with a profound sense of having failed to protect you. RIP
We honour your memory with a commitment to strengthen our fight against forced marriage, and other unjust and violent practices that uphold patriarchy and hide behind a mask of so-called 'honour'.
In 2006, Banaz was killed by her father, other relatives, and members of her wider community for fleeing a forced and abusive marriage
Read Banaz's story here...
Anne-Marie Hutchinson (born 1 August 1957 - died 2 October 2020)
We are very sad to lose Anne-Marie Hutchinson, a pillar of the Commission. Our Chair, Baroness Butler-Sloss described Anne-Marie as, 'an exceptional person whose premature death will leave a great gap in a very important and not always well-understood branch of law.'
Read the full tribute from Chair, and Anne-Marie's obituary in the Guardian: here
Raj, Payzee and Sameem were victims of child marriage and forced marriage. Today they are activists and campaigners.
THEY TELL US WHY IT IS IMPORTANT TO BREAK THE SILENCE
Raj Holness
Raj Holness was a victim of domestic and sexual violence for twenty years, barely escaping with her life from an attempted murder. Raj was being forced into a marriage by her family. Today she is a campaigner and an activist
Sameem Ali
Forced into a marriage at 13 and a mother at 14, Sameem Ali found freedom. Hear what she has to say about the evils of forced marriage.
Yehudis Fletcher from NAHAMU
